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“If a child lives with acceptance and friendship, she learns to find love in the world”.

We all know that good parenting is a skill and to master this skill, you need to constantly communicate effectively and efficiently with your children.  While verbal communication is and has been the most essential and effective way to connect with each other, it has now been observed that, more than that it’s the sensitivity to each other’s feeling that helps to create a stronger bond between the parents and the children. You as parents need to be more expressive and need to articulate your feelings, more often than being commanding.

ggImportance of Communication
Communicating with children is like reaping the bountiful harvest, which parents sowed years ago. Each child wants to be heard, recognised and appreciated. No matter what their age is, they want to be supported in all their decisions and forgiven easily for their mistakes. For a parent to meet such expectations may not be easy at all times, especially when they have a crucial role to play in the child’s decision-making ability and want to develop a conscientious discretion power in them.

While in today’s world, parents seems to be better equipped with handling the psychological-emotional turmoil children go through, but they don’t always come up with the best possible solution to it. Parents need to be affirmative yet diplomatic. Communication with children has to be done in a dynamic way to develop a strong connect with them. They need to make themselves heard not force themselves through.  Children feel a greater sense of belonging when parents communicate on an ongoing basis with them. When parents communicate to reach out to children, they successfully create a trust and loyalty towards them. The idea is not to sabotage their goal and ambition but to document in them an ability to pursue the same. Children evolve as a matured person when they are shown a cumulative interest in their dreams and desires by the parents.

ghSides of Communication
Every process has a methodology to it, and it is not surprising to know that, for communication to be effective, it has to be done in a healthy manner. Like every coin has a flip side, a meaningless communication too can have its repercussions.

Be straight forward
Sometimes it is not good to beat around the bush but to come straight to the point. Parents too can go through emotional turmoil when it comes to expressing their feelings. All you need to do is to be clear about what you communicate and how you communicate. The average parents fail to understand that not expressing can amount to not communicating.

Clarity of purpose – Communicating does not always mean that you lay down a book of rules for your child. It’s also important that parents communicate to nurture a better human being in their children.

On going communication – Children want themselves to be listened to. Communication at times can be done to create room for repose, reflection and recreation of the bond. You must develop a healthy habit to communicate frequently with your children and on various topics, be it trivial or insignificant.

Don’t be an authoritarian – As a parent, you tend to be too demanding with what a child is expected to do. Instead you should act as a guide to help children weigh out things for themselves.

Don’t let your child feel cut-off – No matter what the situation is, you should not let the child feel that they cannot come back to you on certain topics, however, sensitive they may be.

Parents may differ but good parenting does not. It’s a skill which parents are required to acquire to help children develop the many skills to lead a successful life.

Veena Gaur
Dean, Shalom Presidency School